Tag Archive | acceptance

Finding Myself

Hello to anyone that’s reading this blog, as you may know, from my past posts Ive been having problems with my confidence and although I haven’t posted anything in a while, ive been working on my self everyday, and here is what ive learned.

I am now 21 and I finally feel like I found myself. I finally know who I am. Only problem is, change. I feel like a confident hyper social butterfly on the inside but shy and quiet on the outside and it sucks! Now ive been working on myself and I feel like I know who I really am its just not that easy but since ive started to make the change a while back, I now feel like a have alot more confidence then I did before, although im still kind of shy. 

One of the mean problems im having is the people around me not accepting change. I personally see alot more change in myself then my family and friends, they not even acknowledge anything when im pretty sure they notice a different in my confidence. There all good people its just, when I do do something that the old me wouldnt do, they look at me like what are you doing? and its like “?” who do you change when everyone else is saying no? 

 

-diaryofashygirl

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Interracial Confusion

Theres so many things in my life that has made my confidence the way it is today. Im mixed with both black and white. As a child I found myself constantly comparing myself to one side of my family more than the other. Id look in the mirror and ask myself ” why cant i have nice hair like them”, ” why cant i have green eyes like them” I thought it was such a tease to have a light skinned complexion but nothing else. I never thought I was hideous but i could never see anything “special” about how i looked, Now i know looks are not everything! but they are something. I know your thinking wow i judged myself alot as a child! aha yeah I really did and wouldnt dare tell anyone about it! But once again its something im working on and of course im trying to not compare myself anymore and i dont think im the hottest looking person on earth but I no longer think im the worse looking either. My life is a work in progress, instead of looking at myself  and saying what I hate, I look at what I like about it and accept it :).