Tag Archive | acceptance

Finding Myself

Hello to anyone that’s reading this blog, as you may know, from my past posts Ive been having problems with my confidence and although I haven’t posted anything in a while, ive been working on my self everyday, and here is what ive learned.

I am now 21 and I finally feel like I found myself. I finally know who I am. Only problem is, change. I feel like a confident hyper social butterfly on the inside but shy and quiet on the outside and it sucks! Now ive been working on myself and I feel like I know who I really am its just not that easy but since ive started to make the change a while back, I now feel like a have alot more confidence then I did before, although im still kind of shy. 

One of the mean problems im having is the people around me not accepting change. I personally see alot more change in myself then my family and friends, they not even acknowledge anything when im pretty sure they notice a different in my confidence. There all good people its just, when I do do something that the old me wouldnt do, they look at me like what are you doing? and its like “?” who do you change when everyone else is saying no? 







Interracial Confusion

Theres so many things in my life that has made my confidence the way it is today. Im mixed with both black and white. As a child I found myself constantly comparing myself to one side of my family more than the other. Id look in the mirror and ask myself ” why cant i have nice hair like them”, ” why cant i have green eyes like them” I thought it was such a tease to have a light skinned complexion but nothing else. I never thought I was hideous but i could never see anything “special” about how i looked, Now i know looks are not everything! but they are something. I know your thinking wow i judged myself alot as a child! aha yeah I really did and wouldnt dare tell anyone about it! But once again its something im working on and of course im trying to not compare myself anymore and i dont think im the hottest looking person on earth but I no longer think im the worse looking either. My life is a work in progress, instead of looking at myself  and saying what I hate, I look at what I like about it and accept it :).